Join Turg and Randy Z as they chat with their guest Brenda Gonzalez – the co-creator of the Tamarindo Podcast and proud civil rights advocate – about growing up undocumented, caught between circumstance and the law and learning to maximize every opportunity to help adjust to a world that doesn’t quite understand your situation.

Wait, I’m what?

Imagine you’re about to go to college and you discover you’re undocumented. How do you think you would handle it? Meet Brenda. In college, she discovered she was an undocumented immigrant. Thousands of students face the hardships of being undocumented. Brenda’s experience was no different. When you’re in this situation, the learning curve is much greater than that of a citizen. Brenda shares her hardships and triumphs as she powered through her courses and juggled a love-life revolved around a singular objective – marriage. When opportunity knocks, how do you handle it?

If you can’t chose your own path, you choose to make the most of it

Sometimes in life we cannot choose what we want or know is right for us. In Brenda’s case, not getting to choose turned out to be more of an opportunity than a hindrance. Turg asks Brenda how she was able to handle not being able to decide her own future. For her, it wasn’t much of a sacrifice. We can easily overlook the fact that getting to choose is a luxury. Sometimes just having something – even a chance at a future – is enough. Facing challenges might feel limited, but in Brenda’s case, this helped focus her expectations on her future success. Learning to control the things you can control rather than the things you can’t control is an important step to learning from your 20s and mastering your 30s.

What do you do when doubt starts creeping in during your 30s?

Being comfortable in your own skin is a very important part of staving off that sense of self-doubt. Adopting hobbies and learning about what you appreciate now is all a part of identifying what makes you unique. Brenda talks about how a new world of music has opened up for her and helped change her life for the better. Things we might not have enjoyed in the past might now define us in the present. Brenda’s experiences focus on keeping your mind open to new experiences and challenging yourself. Appreciating all aspects of life will help reinforce your self-esteem and grow to accept yourself.

Embracing who you are is the most important stand you can make against any hate or bigotry. Have you had a tough life because of this? Has your life been challenging because you’ve been undocumented? Has doubt ever derailed your self-confidence? Have the challenges of being an immigrant in today’s world been too hard to overcome? We’d love to hear from you. Share your story.